Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Broken once again...

Well, in the morning today, was worrying abt my daughter, worried she might get rejected by the guy she likes, worried that the guy would take advantage of the situation and make her do things she is unwilling to, but then, here she is, happy and hopeful things will turn out good for her, for that I thank God for being such a forever faithful God, blessing every single little thing In the afternoon

Met kai up for a bowling and arcade session at Tiong Bahru Plaza and Kim Seng Bowling centre hahaha, if not it would have been a day full of emo-ing and worrying Damned... my bowling skills has become worse than what it used to be in secondary school... Hahaha... thou my CS skills nvr seem to worsen but get better everyday =) And something to rejoice about, I threw my packet of cigarettes which is still half-filled into the bin, signalling the end of my newly started smoking addiction...

Met Josh up at 4+ at stadium, to play LAN, met Ting Jun, Shao Lun, Daniel, Rayan, Gabriel, was like some LAN shop reunion Xp Well thou they were there for a short while, it was still fun seeing them doing well...

Had great fun fragging kai and josh like no one's bussiness thou it was a 2v1 matchup hahahaha... Went to kai's house for dinner and to improve my piano playing skills =)...

The worst thing that happened today was when I left kai's house...

Walking alone that lonely road, A sense of dread and grieve overcame me, it was like a dejavu... The same feeling that asked me to call her when she was crying after that quarrel with her ex bf Jeff... The same feeling that asked me to be there for her when her gan kor Xiao Yu played her out and hurt her... The same feeling that she went Missing In Action(MIA) and made me rush down to her house to find her... I was really worried, I was really saddened... I felt something dreaded was happening...

Finally I called See Yueh, neither did I know this was the worst thing I could have ever done... Hearing her voice I so longed to hear, I cant help but to realised how much I'm still missing her, loving her T.T, but this time, she told me everything was alright... I cant seem to get over her yet... Its been a month... My heart still longs strongly for her...

After putting down the phone, my walkman phone played this song, Yi Ran Shi Peng You, by itself... The song was one of See Yueh's favourite... without a moment's hesitation, I kneeled down on the pavement by Bukit Merah view, in front of so many passerbys, and started to tear... to weep... was this sudden breakdown trying to tell me to replace my new addiction, smoking, with crying?

An Auntie came up to me, and told me, Boy, dun cry already... Life is short... Believe in yourself and you will be happy =), with that she hand me a packet of tissue and smiled as she walked off...

I was left there, kneeling by the side of my road, with my face buried in my bandana, weeping like some pussy (like kai would say) over a girl, only have I noticed I was so alone in this big big world... Continue my story tmr... =)

CRUCIFIED at 8:48 AM

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Wednesday, October 24, 2007